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October 5th was her birthday.  I still celebrate it, along with other significant days of the life we spent together on this earth.  There is an inner impulse that is as present now as it ever was.  The ring is still on the left hand, and I am as reluctant to remove it now as I was during the “other time”, the much longer time.

Just several weeks ago, while talking with a fellow here in our community, he caught me entirely by surprise when he asked, “When are you going to get married again?  There are plenty of ‘strong’ women here in this area.” His use of “strong” caught me a little by surprise, and then it clicked.  We were talking in the language of his birth – “strong” made sense.  It simply wasn’t the word I would have used if we had been talking in English.

Regardless, I had no hesitancy in telling him why remarriage was not on my mind, and never has been.  I can’t escape the thought, “I couldn’t love anyone else like Joyce and I loved each other.  I could never give my heart to anyone else like I gave it to her.”  He understood my words.  I don’t know if he sensed my heart.

What happens inside resonates with some music that suddenly comes through the ear buds when I am on my bike.  It happened the other day, when two different songs, by two different musicians, took my mind back to when it wasn’t a memory.  Both pieces capture some of the emotions that are involved in that resolve to live a single life.  As you listen to them, and read the lyrics, they may not stroke your heart strings as they do mine.  On the other hand, they might help you ponder what it meant for us that 2 = 1.  First is Placido Domingo’s version of “Sometimes a Day Goes By”.

Sometimes a day goes by . . . . One whole entire day . . . When I don’t think of her   Twenty-four hours pass . . . I look around and find . . . That I haven’t thought of her.

Not even when I’m somewhere . . . We used to go
Not even if there’s someone  . . . We used to know

It’s hardly everyday . . . It’s most unusual  . . . In fact I can’t remember when
But sometimes a day goes by . . . When I don’t think of her . . . ‘Til morning comes and then — There she is again.

Sometimes a day goes by . . . When I don’t think of her . . . ‘Til morning comes and then — There she is again . . . There she is again…

Then, there is “Remember Me”, sung by the Canadian Tenors.  The lyrics have a very different twist than what we just listened to.   It even has some provocative suggestions about life here and life there.  In both cases the music is heavenly haunting (as you listen you will realize why I say it that way).  What you have to decide is who is singing to whom.  Feel free to let me know.  [I think we again have a case of music’s pointing function]  Click here to listen to “Remember Me”, and feel free to follow along with the lyrics.

Remember, I will still be here as long as you hold me in your memory.  Remember, when you dreams have ended, Time can be transcended; just remember me

I am the one star that keeps burning so brightly. It is the last light to fade into the rising Sun.

I’m with you whenever you tell my story,  or all that I’ve done.

Remember, I will still be here as long as you hold me in your memory  Remember me.

I am the warm voice in the cold wind that whispers. And if you listen you will hear me come across the sky.

As long as I still can reach out and touch you, then I will never die.

Remember, I’ll never leave you if you will only remember me.  Remember, I will still be here as long as you hold me in your memory.

Remember, when your dreams have ended, time can be transcended.  I live forever.  Remember me.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, my beloved.  I will remember.  How could I ever not?  And, as I remember you, I will also remember HIM.

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